Beating the Holiday Blues: Experience the Wonder of the Season

Ok, so how does one "experience wonder"? I think at Christmas time it's very easy to get swept up in the whole mood of the season. Everyone seems to be a little more open, loving, and gentler towards to their fellow man. When those walls are brought down, good things tend to happen and we're able to acknowledge them. Yesterday, I helped a woman at Kinko's send a fax. I stayed with her through the whole process and we had a nice conversation as we waited for the fax to be sent. That's not something I'd typically do, but I enjoyed that moment of plain and honest human connection.

Today I happened to experience "the wonders of the season" with my students. I knew that I would most likely receive presents from a few of them. I just didn't know who. Lo and behold, one of my most exasperating students gave me a tupperware container of homemade pretzel/chocolate/m&m thingies. Sooo yummy! Sure, his mom probably forced him to give them out to all his teachers, but it's the thought that counts!

Finally (and this is the real inspiration for this post), today I became financially free of my ex husband!!! I never thought I'd see this day come. Maybe this is how and when it was supposed to end, but I'd like to think it's a Christmas miracle! Our mortgage company took our offer of $10,000 instead of holding out for more money from us and has settled our debt. I'm just in awe of the whole thing. God has seen me through every aspect of this ordeal and has turned this situation into a blessing.

So, there is hope and wonder to be found this season. Just be open to it and when it comes in (most likely, unexpectedly), savor it!

Beating the Holiday Blues: Expectations are Premeditated Resentments?

I used to obsess over making the holidays perfect. Christmas cards were sent out by the end of the first week of December, the house was decorated over Thanksgiving weekend, and the presents were wrapped and put under the tree on Christmas Eve.

Who was I doing it for? Why was I doing it? What did I get out of it?

I was on a mission to prove to my family, in-laws, friends, and neighbors that my life was progressing beautifully and that I had it together. However, that was the biggest lie! My life wasn't perfect; in fact, the walls were crumbling down around me so fast I didn't know what to do. In the end, I was exhausted. No one came around and admired my decorating or cooking skills. XH got drunk, crashed into the Christmas tree, and was then later hospitalized for an emotional breakdown. And I ended up more upset and more alone than I had ever been.

See, I had this screwed up notion in my head that if I did all these things then the holidays would be perfect and everything would be wonderful--just the way it's supposed to be! Of course, the exact opposite happened and I ended up having major resentments towards anyone and everything in my path.

This holiday season, I'm going to take it one moment at a time and enjoy it all. I want to be happy. I want to have fun. I want to have that "warm holiday glow" (whatever that "really" is). However, I can't force any of that to happen. It just will.

Beating the Holiday Blues: Put yourself in the mood!

The holidays can be festive and wonderful, but for anyone who is going through a difficult time in December, this time of year can be unbearable. Last year, I was separated from my husband and everywhere I looked was a reminder of a life I wasn't going to have. I blame Facebook. Most of my friends on Facebook are from high school and college and they're married, with 1-2 kids, and in perfect houses. Seeing their status updates about great their holidays were was one thing, seeing pictures was so difficult! I should have just stayed away from Facebook, but I like to torture myself. Haha.

This year things are a little different and I have a lot to be thankful for (divorced, seeing a wonderful guy, house debt paid off, have my own place, great friends), so why am I battling the holiday blues? I'm just reflecting on the past year, how much has happened, and thinking to myself how much time I wasted/how stupid I was to spend it with my ex. I'm so irritated that my life has gotten "off track" and I feel like I'm playing catch up. However, I can't let those thoughts get to me. I have to take each day as it comes and enjoy it for what it is.

I want to dedicate this week's blog posts to beating the holiday blues. I think the first step is to put oneself in the mood. My apartment is decorated, but I haven't stepped back to appreciate it. Today when I got home from the grocery store, I turned on the lights, lit some candles (love the Almond Cookie and Sparkling Vanilla scents from Yankee Candle), and cranked up some Christmas carols. Later on, I plan on wrapping some presents and enjoying some sweets while watching a Christmas movie. I love White Christmas, but watched that last weekend. I'm thinking the George C. Scott version of A Christmas Carol unless I find something better on TV.

I hope this series of posts will help you or someone you know. A word of caution about getting into the holiday spirit--there is too much of a good thing. I just had to turn off the Christmas music because it was getting to be too much. I was either going to break down and cry or throw something at the TV--2 things I don't want to happen! However, I'm still happy and enjoying the moment minus the Christmas tunes.

Stay tuned for tomorrow's post: Expectations are Pre-meditated Resentments.